10 Common Nonprofit Major Gift Asking Mistakes to Avoid

When you’re not aware you’re making a mistake, it’s hard to avoid it.

So let’s get curious. I’m going to ask you to close your eyes for a minute to imagine a donor you’ve been wanting to ask for a major gift. I’m going to ask you to visualize a space where you’re meeting. Put them in your office, their home, a café or even a Zoom screen. Choose what’s comfortable, and where you think you’d be most likely to meet with this donor within the next month or so.

Okay… do you have your donor and your meeting space in mind? Excellent!

Now, before closing your eyes, commit to visualizing these four things:

  1. You’re in the room together.
  2. You smile. They smile back.
  3. Someone else is in the room with both of you. . Imagine you brought them with you. Who are they, and how does it feel having them there to support you?
  4. Bolstered by the smiles and good company, what do you say to open the conversation?

SELF-EXERCISE: Okay, are you ready to close your eyes? Even if this feels a little weird, why not give it a try? (1) Pick your donor… (2) your meeting space… (3) your additional person supporting you in the room… and (4) open the conversation. What are you saying to them? What are they saying back? Don’t think in terms of pitching what they can do for you, but in terms of promising what you can do together. Play this scenario out just a bit, until you get to a place of comfort or discomfort. Then open your eyes.

What did that feel like?

What felt comfortable to you? Uncomfortable? Did it feel more comfortable and pleasant than you may have imagined?  Smiling people, committed to the same cause, hanging out in a comfortable space together…. from such a space can come many good things.

  • What did you say to open the conversation?
  • How did that feel?
  • If it felt good, why?
  • If it didn’t feel good, why?
  • What might feel better?
  • Do you think it might feel better to the donor too?

REFLECT and JOURNAL: Take a few minutes to quickly journal some answers to the questions posed above. Whatever comes to mind first is great; don’t overthink this. I guarantee this will help you shift the energy for the next time you move into this space – in real time – with a donor.

A Mistake is Just a Misjudgment

It’s not fatal; you can correct it. But first you have to recognize it happened!

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Promise to share

Major Donor Conversations: Promise Contrary to Pitch

Promise to shareToday I want to talk about the heart of successful major gift fundraising.

It’s about reframing what you may think of as a “pitch” into what your donor would like to consider a “promise.”

The pitch is one way.

A monologue you deliver about everything you know about your organization. Usually it’s about how great it is, how pressing the need is, how you know the donor cares about your mission… and, then, you drop a bomb into your donor’s lap with a big-ass ask they didn’t quite anticipate. This often leaves them feeling they didn’t get a chance to get a word in edgewise and/or they’ll be a ‘bad’ person if they don’t respond as you suggest.

The promise is two-way.

The donor promises to make a gift to accomplish something near and dear to their heart; you promise to put that gift to work effectively. You fulfill on that promise through prompt acknowledgement and by reporting back to the donor on specifically what their philanthropy accomplished.

The difference between these approaches is the difference between success and failure, especially over time.

For donors to give at their most passionate level, and to stick with you over time, they have to:

  • see and feel the promise;
  • believe and trust in you, and
  • feel good about their giving.

Promises feel good; coercion and guilt don’t.

If people gave because they felt coerced or guilted by your perceived sales pitch, they aren’t likely to want to do this again. Promises, and fulfillment of promises, build relationships. When you make giving transactional, you fail to build a relationship. Ultimately, these donors will evaporate.

Which brings us to the heart of effective, two-way, donor-centered major gift fundraising.

THE CONVERSATION

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Giant gummy bear

The Huge Mid-Level Fundraising Opportunity You’re Missing

Giant gummy bear

Nonprofits pay a lot of attention to donor acquisition. Then?

They largely ignore these donors, unless…

They become worthy of attention by virtue of being ‘major’ donors. Then?

Nonprofits pay a lot of attention to major donor relationship building.

But between new donor acquisition and major donor cultivation, solicitation and stewardship, what happens?

Usually not enough.

This is a HUGE missed opportunity.

You’ve likely got great donor prospects hiding inside your own donor base, and you’re essentially treating them like, well, poop.

What if you were to begin to look at your mid-level donors as the transformational fundraising opportunity they are?

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"Doing the right thing isn't always easy" storefront art

How Humanity and Trust Supercharge Nonprofit Fundraising

"Doing the right thing isn't always easy" storefront artEveryone’s been saying this, just about daily, for some time.

“These aren’t ordinary times.”

If the anthem for the Boomer generation was Bob Dylan’s “The TImes They Are A’Changin’,” what’s the anthem for today? History doesn’t repeat itself, but it rhymes. We’re living in the face of a firehose of breaking news, and much of it is difficult to digest. Let alone know how to face, handle and get through it with safety and sanity intact.

We can retreat, live in limbo or figure out a way to navigate through this reality and find opportunities to do our work in new and better ways.

It’s a difficult assignment, because it’s not easy to know where to begin.

As social benefit organizations, we want to come from a human-centered, community-centered place, but… what exactly might that be in this extraordinary time?

What the World Most Needs Right Now.

I think it’s humanity and trust.

Usually we have to guess at what will feel relevant to our supporters. Today, we pretty much know. Because we hear it all the time. On the news. On social media. When we zoom with colleagues. When we talk to our friends.

  • People want to know who they can trust.
  • People want their fellow humans to act the part.
  • People want to consciously engage — with humans they can trust — in a meaningful manner.

Social benefit organizations have a secret advantage.

Survival in the civil sector is based on the philanthropic exchange, and ‘philanthropy’ means ‘love of humanity’. Yet sometimes it seems all we see and hear is hatred of humanity. Us/Them.  Left/Right. Red/Blue. Young/Old. Good/Evil. Insiders/Outsiders. I could go on…

There’s a better way. When you infuse your nonprofit work with humanity, you’ll reach trust.

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Thank you note writing

Don’t Blow Your Post-Holiday Opportunity to Thank Your Nonprofit Supporters

Thank you note writingFor good things once a year is not enough. Why do so many of us only eat turkey once a year?  Or pumpkin pie? I’ve no idea! It’s surely not rational. These are special foods we value and take great delight in. Yet we get into a bad habit of thinking on auto pilot. If it’s not Thanksgiving, the idea of roasting a turkey or making cranberry sauce doesn’t even enter most or our heads. And egg nog, hot mulled cider, panettone and stollen are mostly Christmas things. And then there are the once-a-year only potato latkes. Why are we missing out on an opportunity for greater joy and satisfaction?

When things are good, they bear repeating.

And this is most certainly the case with expressing gratitude to your valued supporters!

It’s not rational to thank your donors only annually.  They keep you going all year long. They deserve your gratitude all year long as well.

What better time to thank supporters than right now, and all through the coming weeks, after a holiday season filled with gratitude?

The much-anticipated “holiday season” is pretty much over. There’s a natural let-down for many.  Wouldn’t it be lovely for your donors and volunteers to get a call from their favorite charity? A call that simply expresses gratitude? If you reach your donor, the goal is to have a quick conversation. Most important: stick with pure gratitude as your focus. Your aim is to make your donor feel connected to your cause, and really good about their support. If no one picks up the phone, don’t waste the call. Leave an upbeat message.
            “Joe, hello! I just called because, in thinking over the past few days about all for which I’m grateful, I realized I’m grateful for you and all you do to make our community a more caring place. I just wanted you to know how much your support is appreciated. Thanks so much, and may the new year bring many blessings.”
My hunch is there’s nothing better you could do with your time today. Or early next week if you’re taking some personal (or shopping the sales?) time today.

All the “strategies” in the world can’t substitute for a genuine, personal connection that comes from the heart.

Don’t let weeks and months go by. Connect!  Express your thanks!  Don’t wait until you’ve got a perfectly crafted letter, email or insert piece. That’s called procrastination, or “letting perfect be the enemy of the good.” Sometimes, timing is everything.
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Awesome/Less Awesome Sandwich Board

Key Strategies to Give Meaningful Nonprofit Work Feedback

Awesome/Less Awesome Sandwich BoardConfession: This is something I struggled with in my 30 years as a manager.

I wanted to reward folks, but I tended to focus on things like money rather than gratitude, praise and recognition. And positive reinforcement didn’t come to me as naturally as pointing out weaknesses. I had both a boss (and a mother) who role modelled this for me.

This same critical boss also told me, whenever I wanted to give someone a raise, money didn’t motivate people.  All sorts of other things mattered more, including work environment.

At the time, I didn’t really believe this. I was constantly advocating for well-deserved raises because I thought it was the best gift I had to offer. And, by golly, it seemed like the right and fair thing to do! She told me resources were limited, and the satisfaction from a raise is fleeting, compared with things like greater authority, autonomy, praise and recognition.

You know what? She was right. Not about leaning into criticism, but about what is most meaningful to employees in a workplace.

What Matters Most?

I found, as much as the people who worked for me enjoyed a good raise, they complained a lot more about lack of advancement opportunity, responsibility without authority, a top-down infrastructure, lack of job fit, unrealistically high expectations, shortage of support and an overall stressful work environment.

If money is really bad, of course, it will get in the way.  However, it’s worth noting money is only fourth among the top five reasons people cite for leaving a job. In fact, the preponderance of research into the value of money as a motivator notes it is a motivator only up to a certain point; once folks reach that level, more money has a negligible impact on their satisfaction.

[Background: I was fortunate during my career not to work at places where folks were expected to buy into the “starvation cycle” mentality and live below minimum wage. Where I worked, people generally were fairly and well-compensated. Sure, they’d likely tell you they wanted more money.  But this was not the reason they left.]

“In a nutshell: money does not buy engagement.”

— Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, author, Why Do So Many Incompetent Men Become Leaders? (and How to Fix It)

Employee engagement is a product of overall work environment (culture) and specific management support (feedback, praise and recognition).

Begin with an Engaging Work Environment

A huge part of what employees will describe as “work environment” has to do with meaningful engagement, or lack thereof. And there are two ways to promote this engagement:

  1. Develop a broad, organizational culture of philanthropy [See here, here, here and here.]
  2. Develop a feedback system incorporating authentic praise, recognition and focus on strengths, not weaknesses.

I talk a lot about the former. Today I’d like to hone in on the latter.

(1) Because… for engagement to stick, the two types must go hand-in-hand.

In fact, research reveals

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