Hands giving and receiving gift

Are the Rich Motivated to Give Differently?

Hands giving and receiving giftNot as much as you might think.

Yet people tell me all the time how much they’re afraid to ask wealthy people for major gifts. If you share those fears, it’s time for a little “Charity Clairity:”

Contrary to what your gut may be telling you, NOT asking is not making would-be donors feel good. Quite the opposite, in fact.

In this article, I’ll let you in on:

Three major donor truths. And I’ll cover why (1) you must stop short-changing your would-be major donors by not offering them opportunities to be the change they want to see in the world, and (2) you must stop robbing would-be major donors of chances to feel good about themselves.

Six major donor triggers. We’ll explore how you can make donors feel so good they’ll want to say “yes” — and passionately — to your solicitation.

Bottom line: When you don’t make donors feel good, they’ll go elsewhere.

The Rich Are Just Like You and Me 

F. Scott Fitzgerald is famously supposed to have told Ernest Hemingway “the rich are different than you and I.” “Yes, Scott,” Hemingway supposedly retorted. “They have more money.”

It’s good to remember major donors are, first and foremost, just people.

They may have more money, yet many of them actually don’t even feel “wealthy” (just as often so-called seniors don’t feel “old.”)  In fact, a survey of 4,000 investors by UBS found that 70% of people with investible assets of $1 million or more do NOT consider themselves “wealthy.”

What most donors share (no matter their net worth) is

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Man yelling into phone

How NOT to Ask for a Major Gift

Man yelling into phoneTwice at the end of last calendar year I was asked for a major gift.

Pretty much out of the blue.

Without much preparation, relationship-building or making of an inspiring case for support.

It was clear to me what the charity would get out of it: my money. It was not so clear what I would get out of it. Should I not care?

  • Perhaps not.

  • Perhaps if I were the ideal, perfect donor I would give with no expectation of receiving anything in return.

  • Perhaps if I were less ego-centric, I’d just do it because it was the “right thing to do.”

  • Perhaps if I were not on a quest for personal meaning, I’d give just because the person who asked is someone I know (though, not all that well); it would give them a feeling of success, and that would bring me some happiness.

  • Perhaps if I were not searching for a community of folks who share my values, I’d give without quite understanding the depth and breadth of values enacted by these charities or without having met more of the people involved.

  • Perhaps if I were not examining what it is that sparks joy in my life, I’d give whether or not this cause was currently at the top of my list or I’d been given opportunity for reflection and consideration.

But I’m not perfect.

I’m betting most of your donors aren’t either.

Donors have expectations… egos… personal meaning they’re seeking… communities they’d like to form… and cups of joy that need filling. Otherwise they wouldn’t be human.

And even if you could find a perfect donor prospect, in the instances where I was asked the case for why this was the right thing for me to do wasn’t even made all that well. The ask was about money, not impact.

There was simply an assumption that since I’d shown interest in the past, I would welcome this opportunity to demonstrate my interest even more passionately.

Okay. That’s not a bad starting place. But… you should never assume. You know what they say about the word “assume,” right?

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Halloween skeleton

8 BOO BOO’s! Are You SCARING Nonprofit Donors Away?

Halloween skeleton

Is this how you’re making your donor feel?!?!

 

BOO!

Halloween is creeping up on us, so I’ve got some really scary stuff for you!

Don’t get too spooked. There are also a few treats.

In fact, you’ll get eight delicious goodies — in the form of “to-do’s.”

But first… the bad news.

No bones about it, you’re frightening folks away if you’re committing any of these 8 boo-boo’s!

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Man pointing to ear and hearing aid

10 Tools to Give You and Your Nonprofit Donor Space to Co-Create — and Change the World

Man pointing to ear and hearing aidA couple of years ago I wrote about 4 Strategies to Listen so Others Will Talk, noting the secret to building authentic relationships is to use your two ears and one mouth in that proportion.

It’s a good start, but there’s more.

You can’t just listen passively.

Active listening, supported by powerful, succinct, to-the-point generative questions – that’s what will draw you and your donor (or anyone with whom you’re in relationship) closer together.

But not all active listening is created equal. And you may think you’re actively listening, when really you’ve listened for a hot minute; then gone down your own rabbit hole of reality.

In that rabbit hole, you become the narrator. It thus becomes your story, not the donor’s.

Uh, oh.

Today we’ll explore how to draw your donor out so you truly hear their voice and sense their emotions, not your own.

10 Tools to Connect and Co-Create with Donors

1. Economy of language.

This is something I value, as an outsider looking in.

I’m not good at it.

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Pensive woman

You want change. They want to be change agents. Your job is to make a match!

Pensive woman

How can I make the biggest impact on the future?

Have you ever wondered how major donors think about philanthropy?

To a large extent, they think about it the same way as anyone else.  They just have more money.

It’s good to remember major donors are, first and foremost, just people.

And like all human beings, they are on a continual quest for meaning. It’s the existential search to be all that one can be.

And you can help them!

You (as executive management, development staff or board member) are a facilitator of philanthropy. Your organization exists, in part, to facilitate your donor’s quest for meaning and teach the joy of giving. To do this effectively, you must be attuned to your donors. And, since the wealthy have the ability to make a larger impact when it comes to furthering your mission, you especially must be attuned to these folks.

NOTE: I am not suggesting you eschew small gift fundraising. All gifts are important, and some of your smaller donors will likely engage in other critically important ways as well. They may become ambassadors, advocates, inlfuencers, volunteers and even legacy donors.  You never want to put all your eggs in one basket.  At the same time, it’s smart to develop a strategy to unlock giving from those who have potential to make transformative gifts.

6 Things that May Trigger Major Gift Philanthropy

In the past I’ve looked at six major donor philanthropic triggers. You need to know about these things, because if you can key into any of them you’ll have a strong basis for pursuing a major gift from the prospect whom you’re approaching:

  1. They feel economically secure.
  2. They are in a reflective phase of life.
  3. They’ve demonstrated a desire to build a closer connection with your cause and community.
  4. They are looking for meaning and a sense of purpose.
  5. They are seeking autonomy.
  6. They are seeking to identify themselves as the person they want to see reflected in the mirror.

Today I’d like to review six more things you should be on the lookout for; then I’ll suggest four strategies to help you enter into your prospective donors’ worlds so you can make a win/win match – one that will help your major donors simultaneously help your cause and themselves.

Coincidentally, I found a back issue of Lifestyles Magazine from 2008 (yes, I’m a bit of a hoarder) and was struck by some of what the publication had to say—a veritable peek inside the minds of major donors. There’s a clue right in the way Lifestyles (now out of publication) describes their mission (highlights are mine):

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Fundraising Do's & Don'ts logo

Fundraising Do’s vs. Don’ts: Campaign Thank You Strategy

Fundraising Do's & Don'ts logoHere comes my occasional “Do’s vs. Don’ts” feature, where I share with you something arriving in my mailbox that seems a good ‘teaching opportunity.’

Today we’re going to review a fundraising campaign thank you email.

It’s very simple, which is why I’ve selected it. Because simple can be deceptive. So much so, in fact, that putting it together may seem unworthy of a strategic approach. Gosh darn it — we had a successful campaign and now we’re simply closing the loop and letting our community know it was a success.  How much time investment is merited here, really?  Come on! Just the fact we’re sending this is good, right?

Wrong. Alas, as the old adage goes, anything worth doing is worth doing well.  Otherwise, you might inadvertently create an unintended consequence.

You may think I’m picking nits. Perhaps. But if you’ve got nits, they’re pretty uncomfortable.  And that’s how this email made me feel. Except… for the parts that didn’t make me feel that way.  This email is a melange of do’s and don’ts.

We’ll take a look at the various elements; then assess what works/doesn’t work.

There’s (1) a subject line, (2) the email itself, and (3) what happens if/when you click through and are transported to the donation landing page.

I’ll ask you some questions.

  1. Would you open this email?
  2. If yes, why?
  3. If no, why?
  4. What looks good about the email?
  5. What looks not so good about the email?
  6. Would it inspire you to click through?
  7. If yes, why?
  8. If no, why not?
  9. Once you click through, would you be inspired to take action?
  10. If yes, why?
  11. If no, why not?

First, I’d like you to think about your answers and jot them down.

Second, I’ll tell you what I think.

Third, if you disagree with me please let me know in the comments below.

Really take the time to notice what you like and don’t like.

I promise you’ll learn a LOT more this way. We learn best by doing.

Seriously, I mean it.

Let’s begin at the beginning.

Subject Headline

“We did it!”

This may help: Take three minutes and jot down your answers to the first three questions on a piece of paper or your screen. I want to know if what was in the subject headline would have caused you to open the email or hit ‘delete.’ If you’d open it, why?

Okay.  Ready to learn what I think thus far, and also see what else we’re working with?

Let’s begin!

Does this Email Say “Open Me?”

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Ice Cream Cone Spill

10 Common Nonprofit Major Gift Asking Mistakes to Avoid

Ice Cream Cone SpillWhen you’re not aware you’re making a mistake, it’s hard to avoid it.

So let’s get curious. I’m going to ask you to close your eyes for a minute to imagine a donor you’ve been wanting to ask for a major gift. I’m going to ask you to visualize a space where you’re meeting. Put them in your office, their home, a café or even a Zoom screen. Choose what’s comfortable, and where you think you’d be most likely to meet with this donor within the next month or so.

Okay… do you have your donor and your meeting space in mind? Excellent!

Now, before closing your eyes, commit to visualizing these four things:

  1. You’re in the room together.
  2. You smile. They smile back.
  3. Someone else is in the room with both of you.  Imagine you brought them with you. Who are they, and how does it feel having them there to support you?
  4. Bolstered by the smiles and good company, what do you say to open the conversation?

Okay, are you ready to close your eyes? Even if this feels a little weird, why not give it a try?

EXERCISE: You can do this by yourself, but it works better if you do it in a pair. Find a co-worker, friend or family member to prompt you to close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Notice if you’re holding tension anywhere in your body. Relax those areas (forehead; neck; shoulders; hands; belly; thighs; calves; feet).   Now have them ask you the following questions:

(1) Pick a donor to meet with.

(2) Pick your meeting space.

(3) Pick an additional person to support you in the room (e.g., program director; subject matter expert; volunteer; executive director; board member; other donor). Describe who they are, and how it feels having them there.

(4) Open the conversation. What are you saying to them? What are they saying back? What’s their body language? Are their eyes lighting up? Are they smiling? Leaning forward? Play this scenario out just a bit, until you get to a place of comfort or discomfort.

Then open your eyes.

What did that feel like?

What felt comfortable to you? Uncomfortable? Did it feel more comfortable and pleasant than you may have imagined?

Smiling people, committed to the same cause, hanging out in a comfortable space together…. from such a space can come many good things.  

  • What did you say to open the conversation?
  • How did that feel?
  • If it felt good, why?
  • If it didn’t feel good, why?

Take a few minutes to journal some answers to those questions. I guarantee this will help you shift the energy for the next time you move into this space – in real time – with a donor.

A Mistake is Just a Misjudgment

It’s not fatal; you can correct it. But first you have to recognize it happened!

Mistakes in major donor conversations generally arise when you don’t know enough about the donor, or vice-versa. That’s why there are two kinds of major donor visits:

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